RESTAURANT TAKEOVER

Deadly Dining

by Judy Keech

How many times have you wished you could melt into the floorboards and disappear as the server approaches your table with that look of apprehension, horror really, because your child has just reenacted a familiar scene from THE EXORCIST in public, ranting, writhing, and spewing applesauce and french fries across the table and onto a nearby diner? Often playing the role of the “nearby diner” in more recent years I understand how frustrating the simple act of eating out with adolescent children, (and even teens!) can be. Well, to borrow a Biblical cliche, do not fear, and be of good courage. There is a solution! And it’s not that difficult…

10 More Things, Episode 5

by Staci Pace

and continues...

41.    Go ahead and get used to saying: "Stop that." "Don't do that." "Put that down." "Be quiet." You'll never stop. 

42.    You'll quickly learn why your mom made some meals over and over again. And then you'll ask her for the recipes. 

43.    Don't ever tell your children that they have to pick up their toys or you'll throw them away. Because the problem is that they don’t want to pick them up in the first place, and they’d rather you do it for them. Not to mention, what will you do tomorrow when they’re bored?

44.    You have to set ground rules with your spouse early on about discipline. Because when a kid is grounded from outside and friends it's not really punishment for them as much as you. 

45.    At least one of your children will eat their boogers, one will wipe them on everything and one will try to give them to you, but they all will pick them. 

46.    No matter how many times you tell them not to they will wipe their hands on their clothes. 

47.    Some areas of your house will always smell like pee no matter how many times you scrub them. 

48.    A parent with all girls just won't understand a parent with all boys and vice versa. 

49.    At some point you will wish that you could arrange a marriage for your child, and possibly as early as 12. 

50.         Baking with your child is NOT NEARLY as fun as it sounds. 

Episode 1: 10 Things I Wish I Knew Before I Had Kids

Episode 2: 10 More Things I Wish I Knew

Episode 3: 10 More Things, Episode 3

Episode 4: 10 More Things, Episode 4